Bar and bat mitzvah invitation wording: 12 UK examples

A bar or bat mitzvah invitation does three things on one card: it invites guests to the service on Shabbat morning, to the kiddush after, and to the party, which may be the same day, the Saturday night or the Sunday. Most British families send one card for the service and a second for the party, because the lists differ. Here is what each needs, the Hebrew lines families use, and twelve examples to copy.

What a bar or bat mitzvah invitation needs

1. Who is inviting. The parents, by name, often "together with" the grandparents.
2. Whose bar or bat mitzvah, with the full name and, if you like, the Hebrew name.
3. The service. The synagogue, the date, the time the service starts, and when the child will be called to the Torah if the family wants guests there for that. "Shabbat morning service at 9.30am; the Torah reading is at approximately 10.45."
4. The kiddush, after the service, at the synagogue or at home.
5. The party, with its own date, time, venue and dress code, and whether it is for everyone or for the young people.
6. Dress. For the synagogue, "men are asked to cover their heads"; for the party, "smart", "cocktail", "trainers encouraged".
7. Gifts. Families rarely print anything; if you do, a line about a charity the child has chosen is the usual form.
8. The reply, with a date, and whether the reply is for the service, the party or both.

Hebrew lines and what they mean

• מזל טוב (Mazel tov): congratulations. The closing line.
• בר מצווה / בת מצווה: bar mitzvah, bat mitzvah. As a heading.
• שבת שלום (Shabbat shalom): a greeting on a Shabbat invitation.
• בעזרת השם (B'ezrat Hashem): with God's help, at the top of a traditional card, often abbreviated בס"ד.
• The Hebrew date alongside the civil date, on a traditional card, as a courtesy to the grandparents.

Service invitation wording

1. Formal, service and kiddush

Daniel and Rachel Levy together with Michael and Susan Levy and Ruth Cohen invite you to share in their joy as their son Joshua Benjamin is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah on Shabbat, 12 June 2027, at 9.30am Hawthorne Hill Synagogue, Hill Road, London NW4 9AA Kiddush to follow in the synagogue hall Mazel tov

2. Bat mitzvah, formal

Daniel and Rachel Levy invite you to share in the celebration of the Bat Mitzvah of their daughter Hannah Miriam on Shabbat, 12 June 2027, at 10am Hawthorne Hill Synagogue, London NW4 followed by kiddush Please reply by 22 May

3. Service, warm

Joshua is being called to the Torah on Shabbat, 12 June at 9.30am at Hawthorne Hill Synagogue, and we would love you to be there. The Torah reading is at about 10.45 if you can only come for part. Kiddush in the hall after, and the party is on the Sunday: details on the second card.

4. Friday night

Please join us for the Friday night service at 6.30pm on 11 June at Hawthorne Hill Synagogue, and for Shabbat dinner afterwards at 8 Elm Road, as we begin Joshua's bar mitzvah weekend. Dress: smart. Reply by 22 May.

Party invitation wording

5. Saturday night, everyone

Daniel and Rachel Levy invite you to celebrate Joshua's Bar Mitzvah on Saturday, 12 June 2027 at 8pm Hawthorne Hall, Hawthorne Lane, Great Missenden HP16 9AA Dinner and dancing · Cocktail dress Carriages at midnight · RSVP by 22 May

6. Sunday lunch

Join us for lunch to celebrate Joshua's bar mitzvah on Sunday, 13 June at 1pm at Hawthorne Hall, Great Missenden. Family and friends, all ages. Smart casual. Please reply by 22 May and tell us of any dietary needs.

7. Young people's party

Joshua's friends are invited to his bar mitzvah party on Sunday, 13 June from 4 to 8pm at Hawthorne Hall, Great Missenden. DJ, games, food. Trainers encouraged. Parents collect at 8. Reply on the link by 22 May.

8. Joint bar and bat mitzvah

Daniel and Rachel Levy invite you to celebrate the B'nei Mitzvah of their twins, Joshua and Hannah, on Shabbat, 12 June 2027 at 9.30am at Hawthorne Hill Synagogue, and at a party that evening from 8pm at Hawthorne Hall, Great Missenden. Reply by 22 May for both.

9. Short, for the group

Joshua's bar mitzvah: service Sat 12 June, 9.30am, Hawthorne Hill Synagogue; party Sat 8pm, Hawthorne Hall, Great Missenden. Reply for both on the link by 22 May: [link]

Lines for the end

10. Synagogue note

Men and boys are asked to cover their heads in the synagogue; kippot are available at the door. Please do not use phones or cameras on Shabbat.

11. Gifts

Joshua has chosen to support the Chiltern Food Bank as part of his bar mitzvah. If you would like to mark the day, a donation would mean a great deal to him.

12. Reply

Please reply by 22 May and let us know whether you are joining us for the service, the party or both, with any dietary needs.

Things to get right

• Two cards, or one with two parts. The service list is usually wider than the party list, or the other way round. One page can do both: each household sees which parts they are invited to.
• Shabbat. No phones, cameras or writing in an Orthodox synagogue on Shabbat. Say it on the card for guests who do not know.
• Timings. Services are long. Tell guests when the Torah reading is so they can arrive for the part that matters.
• The child's part. A line about what Joshua is doing (reading his portion, leading part of the service, giving a d'var Torah) is the detail grandparents forward.
• Dietary needs. The caterer will be kosher. Ask for allergies on the reply form, not about kashrut.

Where the words go

A bar or bat mitzvah with a service, a kiddush, a party and two overlapping guest lists is easiest from one page: both events with their times and maps, the synagogue note, the gift line, and a reply form that asks each household which parts they are coming to and any dietary needs. Each household gets its own link with the right note at the top. Pick any design on the designs page and set the headings (the party designs suit the Saturday night); one payment of £40 covers any number of guests.